I was driving back home on December 9, 2015, after just signing the paperwork and writing the check to purchase Monkey Bizness. I had quit my job in October to fully pursue closing this deal. For more than 2 months I had sat at my home office and planned and schemed all the things I would do once I was finally in control.
The next morning, I met with Ashly Myers (our current Director of Marketing) who was informed just the previous day that she would have a new employer. I met with Ashley at a Starbucks and we had instant chemistry. She has been a trusted confidant since that time.
After that meeting, I met the previous owner at our Centennial location to introduce myself to the employees. I sat and talked with each of them along with discussing some operational things with the previous owner.
It was a whirlwind of 20 hours where I went from excited, to nervous, to excited, to overwhelmed, and finally to scared. In all the time I had over those first few months, I rarely contemplated the question of “what if this doesn’t work?”. Being a CPA by trade, I had contemplated the question from a financial perspective, but never from an ego or sense of pride perspective.
I have been around many small business owners throughout my career. I had actually admired the lifestyle of watching some of them being fully involved with their businesses, day, night, no matter what. They were so committed to the success and you could see the passion they had when they discussed their business. Many of us know people like that. I think we all admire them to a certain degree.
What you don’t see is the pressure and concerns they deal with on a personal level. They often keep those bottled up and discuss them only with their closest one or two confidants. To everyone else, they give off an image of confidence and passion. This is not fake, its’ real. However, the feelings of being overwhelmed or concerned they don’t want to project to anyone else. But these feelings do exist.
I worked at a software development firm for 2 years prior to owning Monkey Bizness. I was the highest financial employee in the company. The owner of the company strongly believed in what they were doing and had a great passion for it. He had built the company over many years and was at a point where he wanted to “go for it”. I watched him over those 2 years build a financial, sales, and marketing team. He doubled the size of his operations/development team. When I would talk with investors with him he would give off an image of confidence and passion. However, when it was just me and him or his executive team, you could see the worry he had. He fully understood the risk and while it didn’t paralyze him, it certainly weighed on him.
One couldn’t fully understand the emotions he was going through unless they were in a similar position. Now as a business owner, I am passionate and confident in my business. However, I still have feelings of being overwhelmed or worried if something we are trying will work. I keep those feelings to myself mostly and discuss them with only a few individuals.
I write this to tell you that you too will have these feelings if you take on owning your own business. Most business books don’t tell you about this and so many are surprised when they get into their venture.
Whether it is Monkey Bizness or another venture, know that you have a support system around you. They may not understand exactly what you are going through, but know that everyone else that has walked this path has gone through the exact same.
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